National ID Cards: Make room in your Wallet

Originally Published on Music for America, 5/21/05.

A little more than two weeks ago, Congress passed the Real ID Act, which requires us all to have a standardized national ID by 2008.

Right now a bureaucratic empire is photocopying, filing and stamping the ID application forms, getting them ready for their fantastic journey through the US postal system. One tragic afternoon, you'll shuffle your crooked toes into your pink slippers, make your way down that cold granite staircase and open your rusted tin mailbox, and you'll see that envelope and realize what it is, and say, "Now wait just one darn minute..."

But by then it'll be too late.

Yes, Big Brother is coming for you. But don't freak out, hipsters. Here's the shakedown on the situation.

How we got here: The Piracy of Privacy

Your privacy was compromised months ago. Direct your attention, please, to the big-mouthed corporation to your right, Choicepoint. Yes, Choicepoint cares. In fact, they care about you so much that they collect all of your personal information, your consumer preferences, and any information they can get their hands on about your past product purchases, compile it all into one easy-to-read record, and sell it to businesses who are interested in marketing products towards you.

How do they keep track of all this information? you might be thinking.

First off, great question. Here's the answer: Keeping a database of records spanning hundreds-of-millions of American consumers is hard work, especially since there are a lot of people with the same names. A quick glance through the phone book reveals more than ten John Smiths and, surprisingly, no less than two Keith Richards. Because of this, they organize your information not by your name, but by your Social Security number.

How did they get their hands on your Social Security Number? Well, they either stole it or purchased it without your permission. The practice of selling your personal information without your consent is actually illegal under Principle 11 of the 1988 Privacy Act, but leeway was given to Choicepoint and other similar organizations, because they provided such a great darn service in the name of capitalism.

Surprised? Well here comes the kicker.

Sometime within the last one to two years, Choicepoint sold the personal information of over 145,000 people to an illegitimate business, resulting in at least 750 confirmed cases of identity theft, ranging from wrongful credit card charges to unauthorized changes of address. Gee, thanks Choicepoint!

When the story got out, Choicepoint screamed "data theft," but why steal the data when you can buy it at a discount price? Besides, Choicepoint's checkered past speaks for itself: in 2003, the company nearly sparked an international incident when they sold illegally obtained records of Latin Americans to the INS and other organizations.

Back to the ID Cards

Choicepoint is just one example of irresponsible business practices comprimising your personal privacy. There are many more documented cases of similar breeches from the past five years, most of equal or greater scale to that of the Choicepoint scandal.

Alright, lets do some math. We have the personal information of over one million Americans divided amongst a heaping spoonful of criminals and scam artists, leaving us with an unfathomably high likelyhood of identity theft in America right now. The government can no longer be sure that anyone is who they say they are. Of course, such a premise is not acceptable to the paranoid psychotics of the current Executive Branch.

This is why Congress tagged the National ID card to the recent Iraq spending supplimental. The GOP is hoping to get a handle on a situation which they helped create that is already beyond control.

Use your imagination the way the Department of Defense does. At this moment, an Al Qaeda splinter cell of operatives with access to the personal information of millions of loyal citizens could, plausably, assume the identity of an unsuspecting American and, by internet or telephone, negotiate almost every variety of challenges necessary to hide out in the cities or suburbs of this country and wait for "the signal."

This is what G-Dubbs and company are thinking, and this is why they won't give up on the National ID plan without a fight. But the slim prospect of Al Qaeda operatives training in our nation's playgrounds doesn't get me quite so worked up as the following reality:

Last week I was explaining the National ID bill to a friend of mine who is a resident alien. When I speculated on perhaps what the IDs would look like, comparing them to our current driver's licenses, he shook his head.

"That's not what they'll look like," he said. His gaze unfocused in apparent thought.

"This is what they're gonna look like, right here..."

He pulled from his wallet the new issue Permanent Resident Card. It was about the size and shape of a state license, but with one key difference. Across the front and back was one thick band of magnetic strip, large enough to contain within it every bit of information about his life. Previous arrests, aliases, affiliations, grade school permanent records, first kiss, favorite sexual position... everything and anything.

I did some research on the internet and discovered the card's manufacturer, LaserCard, and wouldn't you know it, my friend was right. Looking through the company's newsletters which were posted to the site, I found a template for the up-and-coming US ID cards. Take a look at your new National ID.



George Orwell, eat your heart out.